Vexed

Hey dudes,

Staying at home being a 宅女 (female geek/otaku girl) is not a good idea at all.

Had been tossing on bed these two days. Thinking a lot: friendship, studies, graduate, work, and the fact that daddy mummy won't be home next week till school reopens.

Regarding my parents' Europe trip next week, I understand that they are very worried about us. Mum was sitting on the living room's sofa these few nights, thinking quietly, not sure what she think about but obviously she's too worried till can't go to bed. And dad, who haven prepare anything thing for the trip, pretended to be steady everyday, in fact, mum said he had nightmares these few days. Daddy mummy, I just want to assure you that, I, being the eldest, will take the responsibility to take care of the 2 siblings. I am already 20, I can be independent. Don't worry, I will prepare every meal for them ( even though I am not sure whether it will be edible ),but at least, I will make sure that they won't starve. There's always solutions. I can always bring the rascals out for a meal. I can drive mum, so don't worry I will fetch them to every tuition. Everything will be fine,okay? Both of you should just relax and enjoy your trip! Be the most lovey-dovey couple during the trip ya?!! Don't worry about us, we will be obedient :D

Next topic, will be about my studies and graduation. I only left half years to graduate but up till now, I am still not sure whether I am on the right path. But seriously, other than drawing and designing, I really don't know that I can do. Yesterday night, I was thinking hard about my future. What should I do after graduating? University or Work? Struggled. I think, it will be nice to enter a University to get a degree, and if I get into one, I hope to join different CCAs like dancing. But the problem is, which course should I pursue on? There's one thing I can confirm, I will not pursue on design course if I enter Uni, because I think that there's no need to, I will probably take other course, but in the meantime, improving my design skills on my own. In this case, what course should I apply for then? Puzzled. Business, Phychology or maybe Child Education? I don't know. Lost in direction. In the other hand, there's another plan in mind. Perhaps I should work after poly graduation. Working as an art teacher as main job, and doing freelance design in the meantime. And then I will think about the Uni after that. Perhaps work for 1 year then go Uni?

Lastly, talk about Friendship. Friendship, this word can be so lovable and caring, and it somehows link to your heart, your feeling. A friend is someone that you feel comfortable with, that you won't feel awkward with, no matter how long you never meet up with each other, because your hearts are linked together. You are eager to see each other and happy to hang out with them. The journey of traveling just to see them is full of excitement. But sometimes, things may change, change to something that you don't want it to be, and you try very hard to ammend it, but what done is done. Or perhaps, distance is the main issues, but I thought Friendship won't be affected by distance? Sometimes, a friend who's sitting beside you, but you felt that he/she is very far from you. Vice versa. Sometimes, a friend who's sitting at the other end of the earth, but you felt that he/she is just beside you, accompanying you and giving you support whenever you go. I don't know whether other people have the same feelings as me, but this is how I feel. Well. Nevermind. I just had some hard feelings in mind that's why I spat it out on this little garden of mine. I will clean it someday.

I felt useless. Maybe this is what you get if you had been staying at home thinking too much about all the rubbish things. I should lead a healthy lifestyle, exercise will be the best choice, if I am hardworking enough :)

Anyway, glad that Wilson just gave me some tasks to do as freelance. At least I can keep myself busy from thinking all the nonsense again.